We have reached a point where everyone’s opinion is taken into account. The same applies even in the case of marriage. Let’s say you are dating someone but the person doesn’t want to get married. There can be many reasons behind it. Either the person is not in love with you or he/she doesn’t want to get pulled down by the responsibilities of marriage. No matter what the reason is this kind of situation can be devastating for the other partner. So what do you do in such a situation? Stay with the person or leave him/her?
If you are faced by such a situation, there are a lot of things you can do instead of just leaving. It is hard for you to deal with such a situation but if you really love the person your efforts are worth it. But before that, you need to make sure that the person has a genuine enough reason for not marrying you. In this article, we will discuss the things you can do to deal with such a situation.
Things you can do
There are two types of people, one who doesn’t want to marry ever. Second who doesn’t want to marry at the moment but they may give in some time in the future. Here are some of the things you can try in order to mend things between you and your partner.
Have an honest talk
Proper communication can clear out a lot of confusion. Since you guys are together, your partner does have the right to know the reason behind your decision. Instead of arguing and shouting, both of you should sit and have an honest chat with each other. The main question you should ask your partner is why they are against marriage. Your decision completely depends on your partner’s answer. In case, you doubt him/her of having an affair with someone else make sure that you find out every detail about it. But if your partner is completely into you but hates the legal part of the marriage, try to discuss rituals with them. Good conservation can help you guys clear out each other’s doubts and queries.
Why do you want the marriage
Before you convince your partner to marry you. You should first ask yourself why it is important for you. What does marriage mean to you? Some people take marriage to be a business contract instead of a celebration of love.
Most of us believe in marriage not because we want to. Either you want to get married because of the social constructor you are in love with the concept of marriage. In reality, marriage is just a legal contract. If you really love your partner, you can plan to stay with him/her in a live-in relation. You will get the same benefits of a marriage except for the legal rights. In case, if the legal rights over your partner are important for you then marriage seems to be the only option.
Trust your partner’s needs
Instead of arguing with your partner, you should look at things from his/her perspective as well. What we mean is you should consider partaking in his/her decision. If your partner is genuine enough and is ready for a long-time commitment, there should be any problem for you to agree with him. Disagreeing with your partner is only going to give rise to more problems.
Let’s say your partner is open to marriage but not in the near future. He/she is going to marry when they feel the time is right. In this case, you can give it a deep thought and agree with him/her instead of walking out of the relation.
Another situation could be when your partner doesn’t want to marry at all but is ready to give you a relation that is equivalent to marriage. Even this could work out only if both of you make it work.
Reassess your needs
Since there is a disagreement between you and your partner, it seems to be the perfect time to reassess your needs. You need to ask yourself what you wish to get out of this relation. If you think you are not getting what you want, you can either take the hard decision or simply give in. The choice is completely yours. No matter what decision you take you should think it through nicely. After all, it is related to your whole life. A single wrong decision can put your entire life at stake. If marriage is the ultimate need for you in the relation, it’s better to walk out instead of staying making the relationship even bitter.
Go for couple therapy
Another way to take care of these problems is by taking the help of a couple of therapists. If you are unable to reach a solution, it’s better to take professional help. A third-party will be able to help you better in this kind of situations.
Find out whether your partner is scared of commitment
For many people, marriage is like lifetime imprisonment. Before you take any decision, you need to find out whether your partner is one of them. In that case, it’s better not to force your partner for marriage as things are never going to be good between you guys. Instead, it is only going to get worse with time.
Marriage is a lifetime responsibility which is feared by many. If your partner doesn’t want to get married, you should first try to know the reason behind such a decision. But unfortunately, the majority of the people fails to keep their calm and end up ruining the relation. You need to understand that marriage is not everything. Its only legal rights accompany by some rituals. If you both love each other, you guys can stay together even without marriage. As far as society is concerned, they don’t dictate you how to lead your lives.